Byooki Ga Waruku Naru
by Danii Flame
Summary: I think it was there that everything finally sunk in. I was going to die soon because of this damned disease! Sora's coping with Leukemia and confusing thoughts towards his BEST friend. RikuxSora Yaoi Sora's Point of View. BEING REWRITTEN
1. Keep Holding On

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Sqare Enix does, nor do I own the song Keep Holding On, Avril Lavigne does.  
Rated **M** for Language and possibly sexual content in later chapters.

**Byooki Ga Waruku Naru  
**Chapter One  
By DaniiFlame

* * *

When a child is diagnosed with any sort of fatal sickness, the hardest part, for the doctor, is informing the family. Now, when said child is informed about said diagnosis, the hardest part for him is relaying that to his friends and family.

I would know. My name is Sora Shitoyakasa. I was recently diagnosed with Leukemia. The only people in my life who currently know are my parents. They took the blow harder than I did. I think maybe because I hadn't quite understood at the time. I mean, why me? I've had a little under a month to contemplate this. That's how long ago I was told. What a way to start a new school year...

I live my life as any normal 16 year old would. I play sports with my best friend, Riku Utsukushii, and the neirboor hood kids. I attend school normaly, and, I get my ass kicked in video games against everyone I play against. Like I said, normal. The only thing that's not normal is walking away from a game of soccer with bruises all over your back from people lightly patting it. My wrists, bruised and sore from gaming. Random nose bleeds, and a consisting pain in my abdominal area. I've lost weight at a rate that would make bulemic girls jealous.

But, I mean, who can complain? I'm still alive, right? This is just one of life's hardships. I know I'll make it through. I'm a strong kid.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Know what I never understood? How people could just start crying over a song. I mean, my mother use to just break down into tears listening to the Titanic theme song. You know, the one Celine Dion sings? Yea, that one. Anyway, I never understood why, or how, people could just start crying. Well, that was until just the other day.

Here's what happened:

---------------------------------

I've always had a thing for Avril Lavigne. I don't know why, but her music just seems to be what I like. Odd for a 16 year old male, I know. So, when I heard she had a new song, I just had to listen to it.

**_BIG_ mistake.**

I should have known it would be a little... touchy. I tend to really listen to what her lyrics say instead of the beat.

So I jumped on the computer to search this song. Keep Holding On. Hmm. Interesting. Says she wrote it for the new movie Eragon. That aside, I find the damned song. After waiting for it to download, I think; _'What the hell. Blare it. Mom likes her too.' _So, music up on full blast through my computer speakers, I sit and listen.

Now, I've really noticed that Avril Lavigne has grown. Her music isn't as.. erm.. angsty? So, she's matured and it shows through her music. Okay, so I wasn't exactly expecting this really sappy song. To say I was amazed.. would be an understatement.

_You're not alone  
Together we stand  
I'll be by your side  
You know I'll take your hand  
When it gets cold  
And it feels like the end  
There's no place to go  
You know I won't give in  
No, I won't give in _

Okay. Cute. Friendship, love. Who knows. But I liked it. I thought it to be good, so far.

_Keep holding on  
Cause you know we'll make it through  
We'll make it through  
Just stay strong  
Cause you know I'm here for you  
I'm here for you  
There's nothing you can say  
Nothing you can do  
There's no other way when it comes to the truth  
So, keep holding on  
Cause you know we'll make it through  
We'll make it through_

That was it. That was all it took. I just broke down there. I stopped listening to the lyrics. I think it was there that everything finally sunk in. I was going to die soon because of this damned disease! I started bawling. I couldn't help it. I properly understood everything. Somehow, it took _this_ song to help me. I was going to die. I lay my head in my arms and continued to cry, not caring that my mother had me in her arms, trying to calm me.

---------------------------------

I couldn't believe it happened. After that, I basically just layed in my room and stared blankly at my ceiling. I didn't talk to anyone, I didn't eat, I didn't move. I think I fell asleep a couple hours later. But, I lost track. All I could think about then was what I would never get to do in life unless they found someone to give me the bone marrow transplant.

---------------------------------------------------------------

_"Sora, you've not been outta your damn house in almost a week! School doesn't count either."_

Sigh. That's Riku for you. The kid worries too much. Okay, so usually I am outside hanging out with him and Tidus playing Soccer or some other rough sport. But, since my little breakdown... I've not had the energy to do anything other then attend my classes and study.

"I'm sorry. I just... haven't been feeling all that hot lately."

Lame excuse. I know. But.. what am I supposed to say? "Oh, yea. About that... I just don't feel like playing around with you guys because I'm going to die of Leukemia soon and I just properly understood."? Somehow, I don't think that would work.

_"What? Why didn't you say so earlier?! Sora! I'm your friend and should be able to know these things! Want me to come over? Take care of you while your folks are out?"_

I shouldn't have said anything. I forgot how he was when I get sick.. Last time I was sick it was with the stomache flu. The kid didn't leave my side. He was constantly taking my temperature, trying to get me to eat and just sitting there looking at me as if I were some helpless child. I admit. It was sweet. But he acted like my mother..

"No. It's alright Riku. I'll be fine. I'm just tired and all."

He breathed a heavy sigh. He was not going to back down. It was a lost cause on my part.

_"I don't care. I'm coming over. Someone has to be there for you right now."_

I smiled. Atleast I knew he would help me through this. Oh.. wait.. he doesn't know about my... _condition._

"Alright. I'll see you soon then."

I could practically hear the smile in his voice.

_"See ya in 10."_

---------------------------------------------------------------

Had I known I be in for this treatment, I'd have not given in. The kid was nuts!

I say I'm not feeling good and he decides to raid my kitchen for soup. All the while muttering under his breath. "If I wasn't here, kid would starve himself.."

Okay..So my eating habits aren't the greatest. Actually... the only time I really do eat is when I'm threatened or if I'm terribly hungry. I don't starve myself, I just don't eat regular meals. It's been chalked up to appetite los due to the Leukemia.

So, he makes me soup. Vegetable soup to be exact. Can't complain. Riku can take anything and make it... great. For lack of better word. He's not the kind to just whip it up. He takes his time and adds things to every meal he makes. Don't know what he added this time, but it was wonderful.

The only thing that bothered me, was he fed me. He thought I was incapable! His turqoise eyes wide with concern as he sat infront of me with the bowl in his hands. Brushing a strand of silk like, silver hair behind his ear, he continued feeding me.

"You know, I can feed myself."

Somehow, I didn't think it would work though. He chuckled and shook his head, silver strands swaying with his head, beautiful turqoise eyes closed and a smile on his lips.

"I don't care. You said you were feeling sick. Relax and just let me take care of you."

I did then what I did only in desperate measures.

I pouted.

Pathetic, maybe.

Affective, hell yes!

He sighed and shifted his eyes to the side. I always got him with it! He handed me the bowl and I reached out to take it. What I failed to notice was that my sweater shifted and the sleeves rode up.

Now, you probably think "So what. Big deal."

It was the worst thing to happen though. I had taken to wearing sweaters and long sleeved shirts to cover my wrists, which were a horrible shade of blue, purple and even green. Bruises from my late night gaming as of late.

He grabbed my arm and with his other hand he moved the soup onto the table.

"Sora, what the fuck happened to your wrists?" He all but growled.

I hung my head in shame. I guess I thought I would be able to hide this from him forever. He pulled the sleeve up and examined my left wrist.

"Sora, I want to know what happened."

I looked up at him then, my eyes wide and watery with unshed tears. This is what I had been worrying about. The confrontation with my friends. Especially Riku.

"Riku.. I.."

I couldn't say it. I didn't want him to know. I hung my head again. Pathetic. That's what I was. Totally and utterly Pathetic.

"Sora? Sora, you have to tell me. Please. I need to know. Are you being abused?"

I shook my head, staring at the blanket around me.

"Then what the hell happened?" Concern swept his voice, making it crack as if he was going to cry.

"Riku. I didn't exactly.. want to tell you." I tried that approach.

I heard him growl. I knew he'd be mad at that. I mean, afterall, we'd been friends since kindergarden.

"Tell me what?"

Oh yea. He's pissed.

"Riku I have Leukemia."

* * *

Anyone wondering, Byooki Ga Waruku Naru means To Take a Turn for the Worse. (In an illness)  
Sora's last name, Shitoyakasa, literally means Grace. Riku's last name, Utsukushii, literally means Beautiful. Wierd last names, but they somewhat suit them, ne?  
If you have any questions, PM me about them. Please review!  
Lots of love: DaniiFlame  
I'm also looking for a Beta. Anyone interested? PM me! 


	2. Of Doors and gays

I own nothing. Except this plot and the brain it comes from.

** Byooki ga Waruku Naru  
** Chapter 2

* * *

The look in his eyes was unbearable. The emotions were too much. Shock, hurt, disbelief, and, anger. I could no longer take it. I did what I had been doing alot of lately. I started crying. Head in my hands, body wracking with sobs. Infront of me, sitting on my table, was a stock still Riku. This is the reason I hate telling anybody anything. I thought the time I had told my mother I was failing Math was bad, but this.. This I was not ready for. Nothing in the world could prepare me for what was happening.

"Sora.. T-tell me you're joking."

His voice was cracked. It only made me cry even more.

What happened next, startled me more than anything. Riku had sat beside me on the couch and pulled me flush against him in a hug. After a moment of shock, I clutched onto him and burried my face into his muscled chest. He held me tightly and I noticed he was shaking. As if he were crying. Well, I can't blame him. I mean, if he told me he had Leukemia, I would bloody well bawl my eyes out.

So there I sat, wrapped in Riku's arms as we both cried. One of his arms holding the back of my head while the other was wrapped around my waist. My hands still clutched to his shirt. This had to be the worst thing. Sure, my parents had taken it hard, but they weren't this bad. Well, maybe mom was. Mom and dad were both devestated. But they held hope. They knew of the proceedure. I had a chance to redeem my life if I found someone who would be able to help with the surgery.

Riku, knew nothing of that yet. But even so, even if he did, I doubt it would help any.

We sat there, wrapped in each other for a bit. As we stopped crying, I started hearing his heart beat. In my dazed mood, that was all I payed any attention to. Well, that and the fact that he was holding me. I don't know how to explain it.. but it felt nice. To be held in his muscled arms, feeling like nothing can ever hurt you again. It was comfortable.

He sat back then, held me at arms length and looked me in the eye. I knew he was going to say something seriouse. I just hopped I wouldn't start crying again. I had already started getting a headache. Who knew what else could happen?

"How long have you known?"

Shit. That wasn't exactly what I was expecting. I should have though. What else would he ask? "When are you going to die?"?

"Since the beginning of this school year."

Again, hurt flashed through his eyes. He blinked and took a deep breath. I could tell this was killing him inside. But, Riku being Riku, he will hold it in until he can't any longer and just punch something.

"Why did you not tell me? Sora, I thought we were best friends. You should have told me..." He paused, still looking me in the eye. "I care about you, Sora. I did have a right to know, right?"

Oh no. I was filled with guilt as well as a little anger. First thing in my mind was _'What's he playing at?' _The next thing was, '_Well, he did have a right to know.'_

Now was my moment to explain. Gosh. This would be a little... challenging.

"Riku," I began, trying to keep my cool. "I wanted to tell you. Believe me. But... I didn't know how. I didn't exactly want to tell you or anyone else. I don't want pity." This was true. "I didn't want you guys to start treating me differently."

His eyes widened and then I was held in his arms again.

"Never." he whispered. "Never would I pity you. Treat you differently, maybe." Not what I wanted to hear.. "But only because I know I can be a little rough sometimes." Got that right. "Sora, what if I had done something that seriously hurt you?"

Okay. So I hadn't exactly thought everything out properly.. He had a good point. He probably wouldn't be able to live with himself if he hurt me.

"You know I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had hurt you."

Like I said. I pulled away from him and looked him in the eye this time.

"Look, Riku, thank you. But promise me you wont tell anyone."

He smiled that beautiful smile of his. Wait...

"Of course. I promise."

I grinned then. He knew, and things would eventually work out for us.

---------------------------------------------------------------

"So, staying the night Riku?"

He looked at me blankly a couple seconds before breaking into a grin.

"What do you think, shorty?" He asked, cocky smirk in place.

I scoffed. Kid thought he was king shit. That's what I loved about him. Woa. Hold it there...

"Of course I'm staying. What makes you think I wouldn't?" Another grin. "It's a Friday, you reject. I'm yours all weekend."

At that statement, he spread out his end of the couch, arms spread wide. Almost as if waiting for a hug... I had to stop my thinking there. Where the fuck were all these thoughts coming from?! I was starting to seriously scare myself then. Like, come on! He's my best friend... Besides, I'm pretty sure I'm straight.

"Hey, something wrong?" Riku asked, cocking his head to the side, playfulness seemed to disapear.

I shook my head violently. I could not tell him what was going on in my tiny little mind. It was too embarassing. Giving him a cheeky grin, I jumped up and ran.

"Come on! I wanna play a video game!" I yelled, quickly looking back at him.

He smirked and ran after me. I shrieked and ran as fast as I could towards the stairs. As I reached the bottom, I triped a little and fell on the stairs. I quickly looked behind me before jumping back up. I would _not_ let him catch me! I bolted up the stairs with him hot on my trail. We whipped around the corner, heading towards my room.

Before I continue, I'll just say this, my staircase is... well... odd. Well you go up, it has about 4 stairs before a small landing. After the landing is the rest of the stairs. Once you get to the top of the stairs, you have two choices, go left or right. On the right is a long hall. At the very end of it is the bathroom. Then you have my mother and fathers room to the right side of the bathroom. On the opposite side is our guestroom. Those are both fairly big room.

Once you go left, there isn't very far you can go until you are at my bedroom door. You basically have a meter from the corner to my door. So, that being said, I'll get on with it.

When I turned the corner, I looked back to see how close to me Riku was. Totally forgetting the fact that my door was so close. Now, wouldn't fate be a bitch and my door be closed instead of open, like it usually is. Let's just say, doors really hurt.

**_SMACK_**! Right into the door and onto the floor I went. So I did the only logical thing to do at that point. I groaned and just layed there with my eyes closed, arms and legs sprawled out. I heard a chuckle and felt a nudge to my left arm. I groaned again. And then, there was silence. I took in a big breath and...

And then that bastard started laughing at me. Not quietly either. A ringing laugh. The kind that is contaigus.

I giggled a little at the stupidity of it all. I mean, I've lived in this house my whole life. How could I suddanly forget? I sat up, still giggling, and looked at Riku.

It almost took my breath away. His eyes shone with laughter, his mouth in an amazing smile as he calmed down. He had his arms crossed infront of his well defined chest. I never thought I'd say this, but Riku looked... well... sexy is the light green muscle shirt and black leather pants he was currently wearing.

I stood up and rupped my forehead. "Ouch.." I mumbled, opening the door and stepping in. Riku followed behind me and closed the door behind him.

"Good one genius." He said, smiling brightly still, sitting on my computer chair.

"Shut up Riku." I growled, trying to glare at him. "It's your fault anyway."

I guess my glare was as intimidating as a fluffly rabbit. No wait... Scratch that. Rabbits scared the hell out of me. As intimidating as a...uh... fuck it. Use your imagination! I wasn't intimidating!

Riku laughed again. "Yea, but who was the idiot who forgot the door was there?"

Damn. Good point. I sighed and laid back on my bed, arms rested behind my head.

For as long as I can remember, me and Riku have always shared a bed. I had a simpled queen sized bed with loads of pillows and blankets on it. It was big enough for both of us to sleep on it comfortably. I've had it since we realized we were too big to fit on a single or double bed.

I stared up at the ceiling, relishing in the memories of our late night talks we usually had. I enjoyed them the most out of Riku's visits sometimes. Just to know that I could tell him anything and he would be understanding.

I grew self-concious as I felt as if someone were watching me. Well, duh! Riku was over, in my room, right across from me. I lifted my head slightly to look at him and found him staring at me. I blushed slightly and sat up.

"Something wrong?" I questioned.

He snapped out of it and smiled, shaking his head.

"Just dazed off I guess. A little tired from crying. Haven't done that since... hell! Since Pa passed away three years ago!" He laughed again and came to sit beside me.

I sighed and layed back again, feeling the bed sink beside me as Riku mimicked my movements.

"Riku, what's your opinion on Gays?"

Where the fuck did that come from?! I say my best friend is sexy once, ONCE! and I'm gay? Well... I guess that would explain why I was never really attracted to girls. Kairi was the only girl I ever dated. That didn't last long. A week, at most. She moved away though. Kinda glad we broke up too.

"I don't know. Why?" He questioned, turning his head to the side to look at me.

His turqiouse eyes staring into my blue ones. I felt lost for a moment. Almost as if I were in the middle of an ocean. I quickly snapped out of it and shook my head.

"No reason. Just.."

I couldn't just say, "Because I am attracted to you."! That would not work. I think my brain stopped functioning. I was at a total lost for words.

I heard Riku chuckle.

"Coming out of the closet at last, Sora?"

My head snapped to the side to look at him, my mouth agape. I couldn't believe this! He suspected me to be gay! Well... I suspected me to be gay aswell...

"I... I don't know. I.. well... I may or may not have a... attraction? Yea. To someone. A male someone."

I said it. It actually came out of my mouth! Now, let's hope I don't regret it!

Riku smiled.

"Anyone to be jealouse of?" Woa. Had I not known any better, I would say that his tone was.. seductive.

I continued to stare at him. He continued to smirk at me in my shocked state. I... I had no idea as to what to do now!

* * *

If you are reading this, please review. -Sniffles- I need to know what you guys think of this story. I'm losing my self confidence.  
This story is still un-betaed. If you are interested, PM ME! 


	3. My Love

Kingdom Heart I don't own. -Sniffles.- I also do not own the songs Toy Soldiers, Breath You In and My Love. Martika, Stabbing Westward and Justin Timberlake do. Enjoy chapter three!

* * *

"Do you... Do you believe that everybody has a soulmate? That everyone has... has someone they were born to be with?" 

To say that question shocked me would have been pretty accurate. For Riku to ask me something like that was pretty odd. Okay, the guy is big on romance. The movies, the occasional novel, even the poetry. Believed in love before sex. All that. But, _never _had we discused things like this. Sure, we joked around about first times, who we would.. erm... _bang_.. but we had really never talked about the whole believing in soul mates.

I kinda just stared at him blankly. Sure, I believed it. I mean, it's destiny. But to tell him that, it should have been easy, but I just couldn't say anything. I was still shocked that he had actually asked that. And out of the blue too!

He sighed heavily. That's when my brain functioned again. I started struggling to get words out.

"well.. I... I guess everyone has.. erm.. someone out there that they're destined to be with... So.. uh... Yea. I guess I do."

He looked at me and smiled. I guess I said the right thing. I smiled nervously back. I don't know why, but lately, being around Riku just... I get nervous. My stomach is a pit of fluttering butterflies. Real Masculine Sora...

"I'm turning on the music. It's too quiet in here kid."

Riku got off the bed to turn on the music, not checking what cd I had in there last. I realised too late what I was listening to the previous night. Argh! He was soo gonna ridicule me!

Out of the speakers began the song Toy Soldiers by Martika. The song brang tears to my eyes occaisonally. A total chick song. Riku turned and looked at me with a wierd look on his face. You know the one I'm talking about. The "What the hell?" look. Yea, that one.

"Sora...?"

I couldn't help it. I giggled. I giggled and blushed. His left eye twitched.

"You... listen to this stuff?"

I nodded, getting my giggles under control.

"Gee Riku. You're my best friend, yet you don't know the music I listen to?"

I had a point. But I was only joking with him. He shook his head and smiled, taking a seat next to me on the bed again.

"Well, we usually just listen to whatever I have. You never say anything..."

I laughed. I liked his music. I could handle it. He was the type of person who kept up with the latest music and stuff. Me, I was totally not like that. I got into the music once it had been out for... well... months basically.

"Riku, don't be so surprised. You can't expect me to be right in there with all that new music."

I said with an air of mockery. I giggled as he continued to stare at me. I sighed and got up.

"You know, if you don't like it, change the song."

I clicked the skip button on my stereo and the song changed. Instead, Breath You In by Stabbing Westward started playing. Riku sighed and closed his eyes, laying back.

"This is a tad bit better, Sora."

I chuckled and sat crossed legged on the bed beside him. Glancing over, my breath caught in my throat. He looked so... beautiful. Ironic. That's what his last name means... But, seriously. He looked so calm. His long, silver locks splayed across the bed, his eyes shut, but not scrunched so his face was the epitome of calm. His breathing was even and quiet, his chest rising with every breath. His left arm crossed over his stomache while his right one was up towards his head.

While I was busy staring at my best friend, I hadn't notice him open one of his eyes to watch me. When I finally did look back at his face, I blushed heavily and quickly looked away. He chuckled and I heard him shift. I didn't expect what he did next.

I was totally startled when I felt arms wrap around my shoulders from behind me. I tensed as his head was layed on my right shoulder. Riku had just embraced me in... dare I say.. an intimate way. The butterflies in my stomache went into overdrive. My best friend... the one causing all these disturbing thoughts in my mind lately... was holding me. And... And I liked it.

He pulled away from me and chuckled again. He got up from the bed to change the song. Saying he wanted to know if I had any real music on my CD. Of course, I only nodded and continued to stare at the floor, which was what my eyes landed on when he held me. Riku turned back to me and I looked up at him. His eyes brightened as the next song started playing.

"This, is music you should be listening to, kid."

He plopped next to me, My Love by Justin Timberlake drifting from my speakers. I shook my head, a smile tugging at my lips. I was supposed to be the one with a wierd taste in music. I didn't know if any of the other boys at school listened to Justin Timberlake, but I sure loved his music. So, apparently, did Riku. He looked over at me and grinned. And there was that feeling again. The butterflies moving around. I grinned back weakly.

Riku laughed as I yawned.

"Tired, So-ra?"

My heart skipped a beat with the way he said my name. Gosh! Why was this happening?! What was wrong with me?! I feebly nodded and rubbed my eyes. Honestly, I was a little tired.

I looked him in the eye and completely lost myself. Those shining orbs of Aquamarine drowning me in them. They were absolutely gorgeous. Just like the rest of him. I don't know how long I sat there, just looking at him, but I snapped out of it when a disturbing thought crossed my mind.

_'You love him, Sora. You're in love with Riku Utsukushii, your _best friend

Oh shit...

* * *

Uh... I should have had this up earlier.. Sorry.. And if it's got wrong spelling... I couldn't find my beta.. lol She hasn't been online lately. I was also very eager to post this. So, please review so I know this story is liked. XD 


	4. My Ass

CHAPTER FOUR!! YAY!!

* * *

With the song still playing in the background, I continued to stare at Riku, my eyes wide and disbelieving. Riku touched my shoulder and I snapped out of it, looking down.

"What's wrong, Sora?"

The concern in his voice caught my attention and I spared a quick look at him. His eyes were sothing and conerned, but still too leathal for me to look at them too long. I hung my head and shook it.

"Nothing.."

I lied. I knew he would know. He's smart like that. Always top of the class. Bright, knew everything. Could smell a lie from a mile away. I sighed quietly. There was no way I could tell him. I mean, sure... I kinda came out.. but I couldn't just tell him I was in love with him. I might not even be!

I gripped my stomache as the butterflies did everything they could to make everything I had eaten in the past week (Which isn't much..) come back up. As the song died out, I tuned everything out. I felt ill. How could I even think of Riku like that? He's been my best friend since... **_FOREVER! _**

At that point, my head began to spin. Everything blurred and I felt everything coming up in my stomache. I quickly bolted out the door to the bathroom. I made it just in time as my stomache emptied everything out in the toilet.

I sat there, hugging the toilet, incase my system decided to be a bitch.

I jumped as arms wound their way around my waist and a head layed on my shoulder. Riku... What was he doing?

"Sora, if you were feeling that sick, you should have told me."

He sighed and turned me so I was facing him. Beside him was a glass of water and a face cloth. He handed me the water, our fingers brushing and sending shocks through my whole body.

I took the water, bringing it to my lips and taking a sip. Swishing the water around in my mouth, I refused to look him in the eye. I spat the water out and wiped my mouth on the face cloth. Shakily, I placed the water on the ground and turned to flush the toilet. After doing so, I stood up on my now shakey legs, holding onto the sink for balance. Riku's arms were out and ready to catch me if my body so decided to fall.

I smiled at him and tried to walk out the door. Key word being _tried._ I stumbled over my own feet and landed in Riku's waiting arms.

"Hold on, kid. I'll carry you back to your room. Don't need you hurting yourself."

He cooed. Oh my gosh.. He_ cooed_. I groaned and let myself be picked up by him. He carried me like one would a sleeping child. One arm hooked under my knees, the other around my shoulders. I lost myself yet again. This time in the feeling of his safe, warm arms holding me close. I layed my head against his chest and he chuckled. The sound was beautiful. Everything about him was.

As he layed me on my bed, he quickly ran back to the bathroom. He was back in my room within seconds, a roll of toilet paper in his hands.

"Sit up."

He commanded softly. I complied but looked at him as if he'd grown a second head. I had just thrown up! I was sick! I wanted to lay down and sleep with him right next to me, damnit! ...

He wound the toilet paper around his hand before putting it up to my nose. Hmm. Nosebleed. Nothing to worry about. This was probably a mild one as I wasn't drowning in blood. But, leave it to Riku to worry.

I look at him, puzzled. He smiled and stroked his free hand through my hair. I swear to god I could have purred had it not been for the toilet paper up to my nose, partially covering my mouth. Taking hold of the toilet paper, I moved his hand away. Wiping my nose, I was pleased to see that it had stopped. Yay!

I cringed then as I tried to move. Damnit! The abdonminal pain was back, full force. I gripped my stomache and huddled on the bed, groaning. This had to be one of the worst parts.

Just as abruptly as it had come, the pain passed. I lay there, panting for breath, thankful for the realease. I rolled over to the wall, head laying on the softest pillow I owned. Riku layed next to me, rubbing my back.

"Sora, are you alright?"

I rolled over slightly and smiled.

"No biggie. I get that all the time. Though, not usually as painful as that.. but it's passed."

He only frowned. I knew he didn't think it was 'no biggie'.

"Just, let's go to bed. Tomorrow's a new day. Things should be better."

I grinned up at him and he smiled back, laying right back on the pillow. I don't know what possessed me to do it, but I rolled right over and snuggled into his side. What surprised me most, was that he sighed, rolled over to face me, and wrapped his arms around me.

That night, I got the best sleep I'd gotten in weeks.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Waking up. Argh. I hated doing so. Why?

1) The blasted sun was right in your eyes as your waking up.  
2) I hated leaving the nice, warm bed.

3) A sign stating another day of dealing with the Leukemia.

Yup. That's about it. That's why.

I groaned and rolled over, pulling the blankets above my head. Beside me, someone chuckled. I froze momentarily. Rolling back over, I peeked from under the covers to see who it was. Relief flooded by body as I saw it was Riku. How could I have been dumb enough to forget I had spent my night snuggled right up against him.

That thought back in mind, I blushed and ducked my head back under the covers and curled into a ball. How could I have _done_ that? _Why_ did I do it?

Riku grabbed a hold of my shoulder and lightly shook it. I pulled the blanket back down, away from my head. I hoped to _god_ the blush had gone.

"Sora, wake up."

He softly said, beautiful smile inplace. Nrgh. Too early for my brain to be thinking such things. Too early to deal with Riku and his sexyness. I groaned out loud. Not. Be. _Happening! _Damnit, Sora! Grow up!

I sat up and rubbed at my eyes. Turnig my head towards him, I found him grinning. What the hell could he be grinning about? I looked towards my digital clock, that had to be the reason. I had always been a late riser.

Looking at my clock, I wanted to beat on the silver headed kid beside me. It was 9:00 in the morning! **ARGH**! He knew I hated waking up before 12. Gah!

I guess my rage and dumbfounded-ness showed on my face, as Riku started laughing. And it wasn't held back either. It was a full laugh. One that made the listener turn to stare in awe at the laugher. He looked, if possible, even more sexy when he laughed like that.

His Aquamarine eyes narrowed to slits, head back, silver hair pooling every which way.

When he finally settled down, he wiped his eyes and smiled at me.

"'Morning, Sunshine. I have plans for us today."

He grinned and, just like last night, my stomache started turning. I took a deep breath and flopped backwards. Riku decided he had other plans.

The blankets were ripped from my body and carelessly tossed onto the floor. With the blankets gone, I was left there in nothing but my pajama pants. I stared, wide eyed, at Riku. Just what the bloody hell was he thinking?!

He was now standing next to my bed, looking down at me with a devilish, yet sexy, smirk. Out of nowhere, he grabbed my ankles and pulled. I shrieked as I was yanked clear off the bed. I sat, dumbfounded, on the floor. My ass hurt. Like... REALLY fucking hurt.. I looked up and glared at Riku as he continued to smirk at me.

That prick was going to pay for this.

I stood up and marched over to my dresser, finding clothes for the day. Riku had better have something totally mind blowing planned for the day. If not, I'd probably be bitchy all day.

Storming into the bathroom, I slammed the door and turned to look in the mirror. I screamed at what I saw. On my forhead, where I had smacked into the door the previous night, was a giant purpleish-green bruise.

That... would be difficult to hide...

* * *

Hope you like it! Worked hard all day on it! And I was actually able to, due to my not being in school. XD HOORAY FOR X-RAYS!  
REVIEW!


	5. The Amusement Park

_I am so terribly sorry for the wait. I lost inspiration and forgot the plot... But, I'm back on track._

I forgot to mention, in this story, it's currently October.

The Bat and Drop Zone are not mine. They are rides at Canada's Wonderland. :)

* * *

My forhead hurt. My ass was still sore. And now, my feet were starting to hurt. Why would my feet hurt? Well, Riku decided it would be fun to drag Sora around the bloody town. He still wouldn't tell me what he had planned. It was just, get dressed, grab something quick to eat, and out the door we went.

We've been walking around for an hour and a half. Not that I don't mind the alone time with Riku... but I hate walking around like this. Not knowing where I was supposed to be going. It drove me nuts. Everytime he looked over at me, I glared at him. His only response to that was a chuckled, a pat to my head, and he would say we were almost there. I growled. This was not my day.

"Sora, would you stop pouting and look?" I looked over at Riku and found him smirking at me. Just then, music assualted my ears. I looked forward and noticed we were infront of an amusement park. Oh. My. God. Did Riku know what he was doing?! Me in an amusement park, not a very good thing. You needed a couple of people to hold me off. I was horrble when it came to this stuff. I loved it. I went nuts over everything. Wanting to try everything in the park.

"Riku... You..."

Smiling, he grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the entrance. He paid and continued to pull me along. At that point, I didn't know who was more childish; me, or him. It was kind of cute though.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Our first stop was to a Roller Coaster. It looked harmless enough. He dragged me on and we sat near the middle. I had a bad feeling once the bars closed on us.

First, it began a slow track up to the top, we were going up backwards, letting us know we would be, for sure, going forwards. Once we got to the top, everything seemed all fine and dandy, until something clicked and we dropped. Down we went, around a corner and under and over a loop. I think we went through two loops, I was too terrified to count at that point. We finally did stop and go up another track forwards. I do believe I paled at that point. We were going to end up going backwards through that whole thing! Again, something clicked and we dropped.

"RIKU!!" I screamed. I grabbed his hand quickly before we went through everything again. I screamed as we went through the loops. Oh, there were definately two of them. Only when we stopped, did I open my eyes. I think I closed them when we neared the first loop.

_"Thank you for riding The Bat. Enjoy the rest of you day."_

Stepping off the ride on shaky legs, I glared at Riku. "Need it have been something like this for our first ride?"

Laughing, he put his arm around my waist and steered me away from the ride. "Come on. We'll go to the next one." Nodding, I only followed him. His hand on my hip was warm and comforting. I liked it there and hoped he kept it in that place.

Sadly, as we got to the next ride, he removed his hand. Looking up at the ride we were going to be boarding, I paled. I was pretty sure the bruise on my forhead, even though covered with cover-up (NOT make-up! There is a difference!), was visable. The ride, named The Drop Zone, was not something I would get on. It was huge! Watching the people ahead of us, I wanted to scream. They were brought to the top of the ride, and it was high, and then dropped. Literally. The seats were dropped. Plummeling to the ground. I thought for a moment they were going to crash before the stopped before the ground and were lowered the rest of the way to the ground.

"RIku... You're joking right?" I looked up at him. He grinned and shook his head. Now, I love amusement parks... but the rides at this one were.. terrifying!

"Come on, So-ra." Butterflies in my stomache again. "It's not that bad." He held his hand out. Hestitantly, I took it. Smiling, he dragged me into our seats on the ride.

Whimpering, I did the seat belt after lowering my restraint. Again, I grabbed his hand, looking down at my feat dangling from the seat.

_"Going up."_

My stomache did little flips as we rose. It didn't go very fast on it's ascend. I started relaxing, my eyes closed, breathing deep.

_"Dropping in Three."_

This was it.

_"Two."_

I tensed.

_"One."_

Nothing happened.

_"Psyche!"_

And we dropped. My heart was in my mouth! I was to scared to even scream! I clutched onto Riku's hand for dear life. We came to an abrupt stop before slowly landing.

As soon as I was out of the seat, I fell. Riku was beside me in milliseconds. "Sora! Hey, are you okay?" His voice was so laced with concern I had to choice but to look at him.

I looked up and then back down. Everything was spinning, My body felt like it was over heating. That's when I felt it.

Quickly getting up I located the trash can near the exit of the ride. As I got to it, I leaned over and emptied everything from my stomache.

"Oh Sora. I'm sorry." He said, standing beside me, rubbing my back.

I wipped my mouth and looked back at him. Smiling feebly I turned to look at him. "No harm. Let's go." As I walked out of the gate I could feel his worried gaze on my back.

When he caught up with me, I turned a beaming smile to him. "Can we play a few games before we do anymore rides?" I asked excitedly.

He nodded and smiled. "Of course."

---------------------------------

Our first game was with balloons and darts. My aim, always horrible, was no better. Riku, however, was awesome! Where I won a small, stuffed pink snake, Riku won a medium scooby-doo plushie. Not that I was jealous. I hate the dog...

"You want to try another game?" He questioned, looking at me from the corner of his eye. I nodded enthusiastically and dragged him towards the water games. The ones where you squirt the water at the target and try to get your thing to rise first? Yea, those. Whatever they are called.

What greeted us at the game though, shocked the hell out of me. They looked like they were getting ready to play, their backs turned to us. But the flamming red, spiky hair and short spiky (Messy) sandy blond were hard to mistake. With a whoop and a scream of "ROXAS!" I launched myself at the blond.

Just in time, he turned around and I ran into his arms. "Sora!" He said, hugging me back. I looked up at him and smiled. Roxas is my twin brother. He goes to a military school, so we don't see much of him during the year.

"Roxas! Why didn't you tell us you were back?" I asked, pulling away to go and stand beside Riku. Riku said a quick "Hi" to Roxas before going to talk to Axel, Roxas' partner in crime (And boyfriend).

"I called this morning to tell mom and she said you were out with Riku so we came here." He laughed, blue eyes twinkling. "Never expected to run into you here. How are you?"

I looked at him nervously. We hadn't been able to tell him about the Leukemia due to his being away. "Umm.. Roxas? I need to talk to you alone for a moment." Looking over at Riku, I saw him nod his understanding. Roxas looked at me quizically before nodding.

"What's up?" He asked, seriouse.

"Well... Roxas, due to you being at school, we weren't able to tell you..." I started staring at my feet. I never was good with confrontations.

"Tell me what Sora?" I looked him in the eye and he gasped. "What the hell happened to your forehead?!" He nearly shrieked. I cringed and looked away from him.

Roxas always was over protective of me. After all, I am his 'little' brother. Seven minuted younger than him.

"I have Leukemia, Roxas. I found out beginning of September." Chancing a quick look at him, I saw the look of absolute horror cross his face.

"Sora.. no. No!" He whispered feircly. All I could do was nod. "Oh, my god." He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in for a long hug. I burried my face in his shoulder.

Pulling away from him, I smiled. "Roxas, don;t take it so hard. I'm tough." I pounded my chest with my fist, concealing a wince at the contact. "I'll make it!"

A small chuckled escaped his lips. "Well, what happened to your forehead?"

I blushed. Quickly, I mumbled something about doors and Riku.

"What was that?" He asked, grinning now.

"I ran into my door while being chased by Riku!" I blurted.

He doubled over, laughing. "Oh, my gosh!" He panted. "Only you!"

"Yea, shut up. Let's go." I dragged him back to Riku and Axel, Roxas still laughing.

"Shut up and let's play the game." I said, looking at Riku.

---------------------------------

We had spent about an hour with Axel and Roxas before we split. I had no problem with that. I'd see them when I got home. Me and Riku a couple more hours at the park, going on rides and playing games. We even got old fashion pictures taken, and got Henna Tattoos! Mine was a dragon on my lower back. Riku's was a tiger on his chest. So, for a little while after getting them done, we just sat around, shirtless, waiting for them to dry.

We were at my house, in my room, just watching television before Riku had to go.

"Riku?" I asked, looking at him from the floor.

"Yea?" He asked, still watching the television.

"Thank you. Thank you so much for today." He looked down at me from the bed. I got up and sat beside him. "I had so much fun." I smiled at him.

Smiling back, Riku shook his head. "It was nothing, Sora."

It was my turn to shake my head. "No! It wasn't nothing! It was everything. I am so happy that we got to go. Thank you for taking me." I looked at him, staring him straight in the eye.

My stomache flipped again. Those butterflies were back. But it was a nice feeling. As Riku continued to look at me, my smile slipped off my face. It was like a scene from a romance movie. I suddenly knew what I wanted to happen.

And it happened.

"Sora..." He whispered. Gently, he cupped my face and brought our lips slowly together. With the gentle press of his lips to mine, I felt my head spin. It was wonderful. It was a kiss that wanted nothing, but meant everything.

When he pulled away from me, I allowed my eyes to flutter open. He was staring at me, waiting for my next move. With a small smile, I moved and pressed my lips quickly to his. "Thank you." I whispered.


	6. Aerith and the Diary

Looking up from the book in her hands, the nurse looked at the brunet laying in the bed, hooked up to the multiple machines. "So, that was your first kiss?" She asked, a small smile on her face.

"Yea." Sora said, staring at the ceiling. "That was what started everything." Turning to look at her, he smiled. "He really is a wonderful person." She could do nothing but smile and nod.

If he was such a wonderful person, than why the hell was he not here with the poor boy? She asked herself, rage taking hold of her.

Almost as if he had read her mind, Sora answered that question. "He doesn't know I'm here. He's in Japan, visiting his family. He wont be back for some time. The house in which he's staying at, has no phone, so we have no way of contacting him." He smiled sadly. "He has no idea of what's going on."

The nurse felt tears coming to her eyes. Every day, her patients vital signs were going down. By now, it was a matter of luck whether or not he would live. It took him more effort to speak than when he was first brought into the hospital.

The book that layed in her lap, was, in fact, young Sora's Diary. Dating back to two years ago.

"Sora?" She asked, noticing him gazing up at the ceiling again. "If it were possible to get ahold of Riku, would you want him to come back?"

Sora looked at her again, eyes wide. "Not really." He whispered, looking guilty. "I love him and all... but no. I couldn't bear to look at him while I lay like this, all broken, in a hospital bed." He closed his eyes as tears leaked out. "I wouldn't want his pity."

Nodding, she understood how he felt. There came a soft knock on the door before it opened. A blond haired boy entered the room. "Oh, Aerith." He said, nodding to her. "How is he?"

She smiled. "He's fine. You can come in. I have to tend to my other patients for now." Laying the book on the table beside Sora's bed, she exited the room.

Roxas took up her recently vacated seat. "Sora, you awake?" He was answered with a soft "Hm". "We still havent gotten ahold of Riku."

Sora sighed. "I didn't think you would." He whispered. More tears leaked from his eyes. "Roxas, it hurts."

"Shh. I know." Roxas responded. He forced himself to keep his tears at bay. he had to be strong for his brother. "You'll make it Sora. You're strong. You'll make it."

Shaking his head, Sora, refused to look at his brother. "No. No I wont." Roxas was about to respond when Sora beat him to it. "Shut up. You think what you want, but you aren't the one laying here, day after day, feeling your body shut down." His voice was no more than a whisper, being unable to raise it. A small sob escaped him. "Promise me, that you'll not let Riku come here if you do contact him."

Roxas growled. "Sora! No way am I doing that! He loves you, he'd kill himself if he wasn't able to take care of you."

Sighing, Sora finally looked at him and smiled. "I love you Roxas." He whispered before closing his eyes again and falling asleep.

---------------------------------

Running his hands through his hair, Riku sighed as he finally spotted a phone booth. It was annoying as hell that his aunt did not own a telephone. Inserting the money into the slot, he dialed Sora's house.

_"Hello?"_

"Hey! Mrs. Shitoyakasa? It's Riku,"

Silence.

"Umm.. Mrs-"

_"Riku." _Was the choked reply. _"Riku, he's in the hospital."_

Riku felt his world shatter. "What?" He whispered.

A sob was heard from the other end. "_He's in bad shape. His body's shutting down on him. You need to be here for him. Help him. Please."_

Riku felt sick. No way! Sora was strong! He was going to win the fight against Leukemia.

"I'll... I'll be there. I promise."

He hung up and sprinted home. Upon entering the house, he yelled for his mom. She came running from upstairs.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She asked, taking in his distraught appearance. "Is something wrong with Sora?"

"Oh mom..." He fell to the ground and held his face in his hands. "He's.. He's losing..."

She gasped. "You mean...?"

"Yea." Riku sobbed. He felt like his whole wrold was being ripped away from him as he sat on the floor, crying.

"Go to him baby. Go to him." She whispered loud enough for him to hear. Looking up at her, he nodded.

Smiling, she passed him her mastercard. "Help him."

Running out the door, Riku caught a cab to the airport.

---------------------------------

Catching a cab from the airport, Riku prayed to all the gods who dared listen that his love be safe.

When he got off at the hospital, he quickly payed the driver and ran inside. Asking a nurse, she pointed him in the direction of Sora's room.

A soft smile appeared on the nurses face. Looked like Sora's knight in shinning armor was here at last...

Bursting through the door, Riku stared in horror at Sora. The boy was hooked up to so many machines. He wasn't even capable of breathing on his own. "Sora..."


	7. PLEASE READ

I'm getting so frusturated with everything. I've lost everything due to a 'Virus' that ate all my software. I'm not computer-literate, so I'm taking it as EVERYTHING is lost. My computer doesn't even start now. I'm so pissed off, I'm not even willing to attempt to rewrite stuff. I really have tried though. It's just not happening. I'm taking a break now. If something comes out, it comes out. I'm so very sorry to you all. I did have half-chapters and new stories I was sure you would love, and they are gone. There is no way for me to explain how upset I am.

I promise though, if I can get anything written, it will be. But don't hold you breath. I love you all and thanks for sticking with me.

-.-Daniichan-.-


End file.
